Meeting 1st May – Milestones and Poems

 Photo by rawpixel.com from PexelsOne of the highlights of Wednesdays meeting was Gerry completing his 10th and final speech in the Competent Communicators manual. It was a fascinating speech about Eamon Broy’s role in the War of Independence.

 

We also had an open mic slot from Wendy Rachko who recited some of her own poems, which are reproduced below:

 

In a cage with a term of You

In a cage, it’s so safe on my own

In my anxiety the only

I often close myself in a cage alone

I am afraid of my morning

 

To create a few dangerous things

To create some horror and hazard

To dream about no borders and links

So is the being itself sufficient, balanced?

 

We exist and we don’t

We kill our power

We have it only in dream’s source

We are looking for a fairy in our manner

 

The big anxiety,

Is slowly pushing to the reason

It is blinking, it’s a rationality

So is love unreason?

 

To touch and grab the power of the big issue

I would take it and run, run to the biggest loosing

I would take from you, touch you.

To kill the power of term which You are still holding

 

I would take off so far from this prison,

I would treasure my flight

Without the command of unreason

I wouldn’t look back!

 

And once in the future, I will turn to my past wants

With a smile and without anxieties

I will be aware of my bounds

With a belief in my abilities

 

It is not enough only to look at the beauty

I love and this love escapes the beauty of the soul

Not enough only to dream about the future’s duty

I apologize for my drawbacks and for all

 

I am so valueless

If I don’t have you in myself as a relief,

The road is so aimless,

If the doubts are built on the belief

 

Oh, the eternal misbeliever in that true

He is changed by something different

Only with the question: where are you?

And without it

All becomes irrelevant

 

To cry, and it is different in this situation,

To love, it’s so ironic, it’s so ridiculous

The first intensive desperation,

Oh! in a cage with a term of You without the real You, it’s ridiculously Ridiculous.

 

Unbridgeable

That feeling when you make your tea

Am I supposed to be speechless?

Maybe I think but I know it is not for me I feel devastated

I am not free.

 

That feeling when you are hungry,

But it is not for me.

I feel so ugly,

Whenever you are tired

I know it is tired of me.

 

That emotion of loneliness

When you’re not here

That strong wave of nothingness,

We can´t make it disappear.

 

Why can´t we make it work for us?

Why do I feel like I am burning and I can´t stop?

 

Why do you say you love, when you also make jokes about lust?

 

Is it a gun for you which

you can´t trust?

 

Is it something too heavy to bear?

 

Is there something so disturbing within it, which makes you not to stay with me there?

 

I know I should relax,

Like you always say

But I need to know who I am

 

Hard questions, hard life, and feelings

Some of them died already

Some of them burnt

Only on a crazy level, I am ‘steady’. I really don’t care who I am anymore

 

I want to be aware of this gulf

I have a more important question before:

 

Why am I falling just into that space between us?

 

Why is it always unbridgeable when we try?

Why am I the only one worrying so much about this?

Is it because you have just always denied it?

 

When it hurts it hurts so bad I don’t want to exist

 

Why does it hurt? Why aren’t you here?

Why have you just set up a fire of being

and then that sudden change to fear?

 

I don’t want to finish these thoughts

 

I am afraid of that which I know you are

 

It doesn’t mean I treasure the same losses

I just can’t find ours ‘here and now’

 

Find me again

Where does our hope live? Does it have a home?

And does it make sense each of us alone ?

I am here in love, not knowing what it is

Here not feeling love, and boundaries appear.

 

I haven’t found the truth, maybe there is none

I am supposed to trust in my own wisdom

before I was falling into you what should I do I never knew

There’s nothing real, only true.

 

How to take pain and still become

How to make space for two to belong

Without always feeling eternally wrong

Without always feeling we will be undone.

 

How to lose it all and find me again

How to rebuild, how to mend

Where is the freedom, where is my friend

Beautifully empty desire without end

 

I haven’t found the truth, maybe there is none

I was supposed to trust in my own wisdom

before I was falling into you I never knew

 

There’s nothing real, only true.

Nothing real, only true